Captioning made possible by turner entertainment group
So how long has he been out there?
3 hours.
That's frickin' amazing!
It's frickin' impossible.
The pressure should explode his head instantly.
Ok.
Holy crap! I know who that guy is!
What would you do with a trillion dollars?
Well, if you said build a golden fortress
At the center of the earth to enslave troglodytes,
Your name must be max stone,
The rebel extreme trillionaire.
Internet! I just bought it.
Ha ha ha! Suckers!
Uh...
Wh-Where the hell did he go?
Whoa!
Look out! Awesome.
How the hell did you get in here?
Jetpack! Transportation mode of the future!
And how did you survive the water pressure?
It's called mathematics, look it up, dummy.
Wait, what?
Enough chitty-Chat!
I claim this place in the name of me...
Max stone!
Muchas gracias, dan.
Y-You can't claim sealab.
It belongs to the u.S. Government.
Government? Ah, hold on a sec.
Hello, telephone, get me the government.
Beep, boop, beep. Hello, government?
Buy. Sell. Buy, sell!
Ha ha ha ha! You're an a-Hole. Click.
The rebel extreme trillionaire max stone
Has just purchased sealab.
Plus... Bees!
Yeah, i own this tank of crap now
And i'm taking it to the extreme!
Awesome!
Extreme?
This is a serious research station!
Seriously boring!
So, i filled the hallways with rabid alligators.
Aah!
A whip cracka!
If i was you, i'd get yourself some big sticks.
Mr. Stone, let me just say...
It is an honor, sir. Whatever you need...
Well, thanks for kissing my ass, headset.
Money.
Some double money.
I don't care who you are,
You can't take over my sealab!
I won't let ya.
So, you're telling me i can't,
I cannot do something?
Well, folks told max stone he couldn't bungee jump
The grand canyon using a thousand deadly cobras as a cord!
Guess what happened, stupid? Slide!
To the max!
Great job, dano.
Ya got yourself a real gift, son.
The gift of you're fired. Ha ha ha! Get it?
You, hair guy, grab that guitar and make it sing.
Ok.
Belay that order!
Mr. Stone was just about to leave.
Jet pack!
Agh!
You mean just about to lead!
You see that's where we differ!
'cause i'm max stone, a leader of men.
You women out there hit the bricks.
What?
You couldn't lead a monkey to a banana raffle!
A leader needs funny catch phrases
Like, "take it to the max"
And "monkey banana raffle."
Well, ah...
I got a catch phrase, i've just, ah...
I've just never had a chance to use it.
Ahem.
"damn! That's cold, y'all!"
Carbonite gun!
Monkey banana raffle!
Damn, that's cold, y'all.
Damn it! This is not over.
Aw, hell no. Gonna get him de-Thawed,
Call the government, and then... Aw, damn!
Nyang, nyang, nyang!
What we need around here is a clear hierarchy
With me at the top.
Hey, you there, put my head on a dog.
What's with the blank looks, people?
Remember egypt?
What the is wrong with this guy?
Oh, i am so sorry. Was that too extreme for ya?
Well, how about this, hot shot?
You're fired, monkey balls!
What's your job?
I am sealab's medical officer.
Pleased to meet you.
Well, have fun in the burn unit, dago,
'cause you're fired!
What's your deal, eyeballs?
I make the robots.
Well, if a big-Ass robot comes up to ya
And says he'll be back,
Ya better listen to him, 'cause you're terminated!
Pop culture reference! Look it up, stupid!
Now, what's your deal, red?
I'm the fire inspector.
Too easy!
Hey, earmuffs! I love you.
You're in charge till i get back.
I'm going to the moon for a sandwich.
Anybody else want one?
Uh, yeah! I'd love a moonwich!
You got a million dollars?
No.
So, you ain't getting a sandwich, are you, dumbass?
To the moon!
Hurray! Hurray!
There. Good as new.
Well, kinda.
Hey, knock it off!
Oh, what? So, now you hate soda pop?
No! I'm talking to him!
I gotta have that!
Mmm! Cheese just tastes better on the moon.
Ain't that funny?
Moon money. Go get yourself
Some more of them silver britches, moon waiter.
Hot damn, i love this moon!
Look, quinn, rebel extreme trillionaire max stone
May have some quirks,
But you gotta give him one thing...
Uh, the point is...
He's been here all of what, 10 minutes?
And sealab's already running better than it ever did
When the government was in charge, ok?
And have you seen the budget for your research lab, quinn?
He increased it 300%.
300%?
Wow, i... Stop it!
I can finally resume my genetics research!
Haven't you done enough already?
You get back in your cage!
Meow!
Uh, well... The real point is,
This is gonna go horribly wrong,
And i'll end up saving the day.
Y'all can't see that?
You're the non-Seeing one!
Max is great!
I mean, he helped me start a mission
At the center of the earth!
Listen up, troglodytes! There's gonna be a little lady
Comin' around these parts preaching the good word.
I want y'all to be on your best behavior.
I'm looking at you, gragamel!
My name is steve!
Now get back to mining my gold.
A whip cracka!
Agh!
Damn it! I told y'all to get big sticks!
So beautiful.
I can't eat it.
Sparks, what's wrong!
What? Everything's fine.
The vaporators!
Chuggin' away at 150% efficiency, my man.
Hooray!
Uh... Kelp? Problem with the kelp!
Harvested this morning, chicken little.
Bees!
Uh... There aren't any?
Damn it!
Isn't there something or someone around here
That needs saving?
Quinn, come quick!
A-Ha! Here we go!
Alarm!
Uh, seriously, dude,
You need to calm the down.
Alarm!
What the hell is wrong with you?
I, uh...
I thought there was a...
Alarm!
No, silly stupid dumdum. We wanted to show you
The giant electron microscope max got you.
Really? Huh.
Agh! Look out!
Demon!
Look out! Holy crap!
It's max!
I know that dude!
First man in history to eat a shark
From the inside out.
Cross it of the old honey-Do list.
Welcome back, sir!
As per your instructions,
I fired, like, a hundred more people
And equipped all the hallway alligators with nail guns.
That's awesome!
And now i'm bored.
What? Come again?
Bored! This place sucks. I'm outta here!
No, wait! No, don't go.
No, no, no, please, wait, sir!
Please, you can't leave, sir.
This place has never run more smoothly.
Even flipper guy is contributing.
I'm still sexually active.
Hooray!
Flipper penis.
What do you say, eyeballs? You want me around?
Aw, man...
Yeah. Please stay.
Well, super! But it's going to have to be
A hell of a lot more interesting in this crap of tank.
Scratch that, reverse it.
Uh, sir? Hey, i'm just spitballing here,
But what about bats made of fire
Just bouncing off the walls all the time?
Ooh! I love it!
You people keep surprising me with stuff like that, and...
Oomph! My balls! Stormy!
No! No! That's great! I love it.
You totally surprised me, son. Keep up the good...
Booya! Stormy!
Nope. Seen that one already.
Now you're boring me.
You gotta think of the craziest thing you can,
Set it on fire, chase it with a shark,
And then you're getting somewheres!
Bees!
You dumb dirty bastards.
Now what did i just say, people?
The bee thing's old hat... Seen it.
Now, if you'd just follow my instructions...
B, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b, b!
Oh, my god!
Ha ha ha! I love it!
Never saw it coming! Ha ha ha!
Nope. Bored again.
Ok. Just give me...
Just give me a bunch of them in a row, ellis.
Ok.
Captioning made possible by turner entertainment group
Uh, do troglodytes go to heaven?
Mmm... No.
Captioned by the national captioning institute www.Ncicap.Org...
Is it 'cause i'm gay?
You're gay?
We're kind of all gay.
Yeah. There's no lava women.
Then, i'm afraid you're all going to burn
In fiery lava pits for the rest of eternity.
Hooray!
Lava gay man, yay! Ha ha ha!